Check out my latest article at YourTango.com on the incredible power of denial in relationships that are psychologically abusive.
Consider the following to increase pleasant activities into your lifestyle:
What is on your top 5 list of pleasant activities?
Now my book is available on Amazon.com!
Are you or have you been in a relationship with someone who has been harsh, cruel and vindictive? Have you felt controlled, demeaned and belittled? Do you feel confused, inadequate and anxious all the time?
"Narcissistic abuse" is a form of emotional and psychological abuse inflicted by a person who is mostly likely on the pathological narcissism spectrum, such as narcissistic personality disorder, antisocial personality and/or psychopathy. It is also helpful in any relationships with psychologically abusive individuals, such as those struggling with addictions or other “toxic” behaviors and disorders. The focus of this book is not on the pathology of the toxic person but rather with the healing of the survivor.
Psychologically abusive relationships are traumatizing. Repeated exposure to a cruel, controlling, harsh and vindictive partner is traumatizing, often triggering the "flight, fight or freeze" fear response in the survivor’s brain. This program uses proven methods to aid the brain to “re-wire” and heal itself.
This book is helpful if you are currently in a pathological relationship as well as those who have left, to unravel the complicated, painful, and often terrifying task of recovery.
The 26-module ebook dives deep into narcissistic abuse and recovery. Within these pages include numerous case examples, information, powerful techniques, thought-provoking exercises and specific healing activities to aid in recovery:
What is narcissistic abuse?
The process of addiction
The stark reality of toxic people
Fighting the injustice
Symptoms of codependence
Consequences of codependence
Assertiveness and healthy boundaries
Stages of toxic relationships
Parenting after separation/divorce from an abusive person
Understand the reasons you stayed
The power of thought
Thoughts, beliefs and assumptions
Stabilization and safety
Download your copy today and reclaim your life!
What thoughts come up for you when you think of a flower? What symbol best represents you?
I feel honored to share my Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Course with you, as both a therapist and as someone who has encountered toxic personalities. I have experienced and witnessed the devastation of narcissistic abuse in workplaces, relationships and families and believe it is my life’s work to raise public awareness about this serious issue and to help survivors conquer the pain and destruction of this hidden abuse.
On my life journey, I have been affected by toxic personalities at a young, vulnerable age. I can say from personal experience, the damaging effect of these individuals can alter a person’s life and shape them in ways that are hard to even fathom. However painful my experience, I feel lucky to have overcome these obstacles and empowered myself to achieve incredible joy, peace and harmony in my life.
I have worked as a therapist for over twenty years helping people improve their lives. I have a Master’s degree in Clinical Social Work and have a Certification in Coaching. I have dedicated both my career and life to assisting others to heal from pain and reach their individualized vision of self-improvement.
My personal empowerment led me to recognize my life's purpose to share my passion and help others to recover from relationship trauma. This led me to create the Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Course, a program to heal the shattering trauma of toxic relationships. After narcissistic abuse, most people notice they are unable to move on and can't seem to “get over” the pain. The truth is, it is harder to recover from these relationships because your body, mind and soul have been traumatized by the experience. The course is filled with information, examples, and healing tools to help people recover from these harmful relationships.
In 1996 I began to practice Clinical Social Work and currently work in private practice. I strive to raise awareness about narcissistic abuse through my writings on YourTango.com and social media, and am a member the World Narcissistic Abuse Awareness Day organization.
I am a proud mother of two wonderful teenagers (girl and boy) and fiancée of a tender-hearted, kind man and daughter of two wise and loving parents. I enjoy walking in the splendour of the outdoors. When I’m not working or writing, I tend to be visiting with family and friends, expressing myself through creative art and collecting strange and wonderful oddities.
Recovering from psychological abuse is a process that we need to invest time into for the rest of our lives. The Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Course is designed to provide information, case examples, powerful techniques, thought-provoking exercises and specific healing activities that are crucial in recovery from narcissistic abuse. This blog post will cover a very important component of recovery: pleasant activities.
There is a direct correlation between pleasant activities and our mood. The more activities we participate in that are fun, and that inspire our passion and joie de vivre, the better we feel. Even better, with every positive memory we create through our actions each and every day the more positive neural pathways are created in our brains.
Laughing. Love-making. Exercise. What do these three have in common? They stimulate the release of endorphins, the pain-killing pleasure chemicals. Make sure you take time to enjoy your life. Too often, when we’re in the throes of life, we forget the importance of pleasure. We become so focused on everything we have to do in our lives that we can become overrun with the enormity of it all, constantly fixated on the next job on our never-ending To-Do list.
Don’t let this happen to you. If you are one of those people who find pleasure in your work, consider yourself lucky. Otherwise, set aside time to pursue activities that give you joy. Hobbies, leisure activities, fun with friends and family—all things that keep our brains constantly fuelled by endorphins that work as a kind of inoculation against pain.
Increase the amount of pleasant activities gradually. Make a plan, one day at a time, of what you would like to do and then set out to make it happen. Start small and simple at first and break activities down into small, achievable steps. Don’t expect perfection. Avoid the perfection trap altogether and focus on fun and relaxation. Be patient with yourself. You may not find activities as enjoyable as you did in the past, but this is because of the trauma. Your joy will come back to you, with time, persistence and patience. Give yourself a break. If you can’t do it one day, that’s okay. Don’t see it as a failure. Just pick yourself up and move forward. Once you experience success with pleasant activities you will find it easier and easier, and your self-confidence will grow.
Take a few minutes to consider the following pleasant activities, and then add your own to the list.
Coffee/Dinner with a friend
Exercising or Sport
Music Reading a Book
Going to a
Playing with a Pet with a Pet
Writing in a Journal
Attending a Sporting
Going to a Movie
Surfing the Internet/Pinterest the Internet/Pinterest
Going to a Party
Doing a Visualization
Playing an Instrument/Singing
Having a Warm Bath
Reading a Magazine
Going to the Spa to the Spa
Live Music Live Music
Learning a New Hobby (pottery, painting)
What are some of your ideas for pleasant activities?
Excerpt from my Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Course, now available for purchase here.